Mail Order Brides – A look into the then and now of this marriage phenomenon

You could very well be excused for thinking that the mail order bride system is an exclusively modern system, related to the Internet and the online dating and matchmaking scene. However, this rather popular method of finding a companion for life is much older than that.

In fact, it goes without saying that the term ‘mail order bride’ itself is a rather controversial one in today’s world, increasingly concerned with women’s rights issues, because it implies that the women are being traded as commodities. In reality, however, the term is a misnomer and most of the so called mail order bride agencies are nothing more than marriage agencies, where women advertise their intention to seek a husband abroad and male clients pay a fee to be put in contact with the women they are interested in.

On the other hand, trafficking of women does unfortunately exist on a worrying scale around the world and this also takes place via online methods, which is why we always recommend that people always stick with the more reputable mail order bride websites to be on the safe side.

 

How it all started

Back in the 18th and 19th centuries, when different parts of the United States were still being settled by colonies made up mostly of men, finding a bride generally proved to be a particularly daunting task, so male settlers started to look further afield to find their women. At the same time, women from Europe, and in some cases from the American continent as well, were tempted to head west in search of fortune and a husband. This gave rise to a thriving mail order bride business through which women could announce their intent to marry and so find an appropriate suitor.

Mail order brides saw a new resurgence after World War II, when American GIs began to write to women they had never even met before, and by the 1980s, an increasing number of western men were using international marriage agencies, like Cherry Blossoms, to find their soul mate. In those days before the Internet, the mail order bride agencies used to distribute paper catalogues and all communication used to take place via snail mail, making the whole process a good deal more time-consuming than it is today.

It was Asian brides, mainly from Thailand and the Philippines, who first began to advertise themselves as mail order brides in the ‘80s, and this is the reason for the mistaken idea that the mail order bride system is all about western men buying Asian brides. Since the collapse of the Soviet Union, however, there has been a huge surge in eastern European women, especially Russian brides and women from Ukraine and Moldova using the mail order bride system, and more recently Latin Brides from Central and South America have joined in as well.

Even though mail order brides typically come from poorer countries, surprisingly enough, a considerable number of women from some developed nations, such as Canada, Sweden and Japan, are also leaving their countries as mail order brides nowadays.

Mail order brides in today’s world

The Internet has of course revolutionized the international marriage and dating scene and offers plenty of opportunities for men and women from all over the world to get to know each other, from the typical free social networks, to online dating sites like FriendFinder.com, Amigos.com and date.com.

With the transition to the online age, the mail order bride system has also grown exponentially and today Cherry Blossoms continues to maintain its position at the forefront, together with other websites such as Elena’s Models and LoveMe.com (which has now actually distanced itself from the ‘mail order bride’ label).

In fact, most mail order bride websites today could easily be confused with online dating sites, such as Filipina Heart, ThaiLoveLinks.com or Sesile.com. The main difference between the two is that the women on the mail order bride sites are specifically looking for marriage and a long term relationship, as opposed to those on the online dating sites who are typically more varied in the kinds of relationship they are seeking.

Naturally, the reasons why women look to marry abroad will differ from one woman to another, however, critics of the mail order bride system say that in many cases these women are ‘forced’ to become mail order brides by the socio-economic situation in their home country, which they feel offers them no alternative option. On the other hand, future husbands must also tread cautiously and beware of potential scammers mingling among the legitimate women who use these websites.

Keeping women as safe as possible

Any relationship carries an element of risk, and more so when the people involved are separated by thousands of miles of land and sea. In the case of men, it is usually their wallet and their ego that are at stake, but women generally have much more to lose, for obvious reasons. In view of this, the United States passed the International Marriage Broker Regulation Act (IMBRA) in 2005, in order to help protect foreign women by making these international relationships more transparent.

IMBRA requires all mail order bride and dating agency websites based in the United States to collect personal information (such as criminal records, number of children, divorces and so on) from their male clients and pass it on to the foreign women they contact. At the same time, US citizens who apply for a visa to bring their fiancée to the United States have to show that the woman has been given all this personal information beforehand, whether or not the mail order bride agency they have used is based in the US or not.

Of course, many agencies were initially afraid that this new regulation would hurt their business but in reality that hasn’t happened. The thing is that IMBRA indirectly offers additional security to well-intentioned male clients too, by weeding out many of the less sincere women who don’t want to go through the extra steps in order to contact their victims and scam them out of money.

The implementation of IMBRA is a move that we wholeheartedly support, primarily because we believe that foreign women deserve to have as much information as possible about their future husbands, before making a decision to marry and move to another country. After all, isn’t the whole aim of marriage agencies to help people find love and happiness?

As the world gets smaller and more interconnected, both via the Internet and through improved global transport networks, marrying a foreigner is becoming more commonplace than ever. With today’s increasing emphasis on the value of cultural diversity, more and more people are venturing out to find love beyond the borders of their own countries. For many of these people, and despite the obvious risks involved, the mail order bride system has given them the chance to find the love of their life and make their dreams come true.